Questioning Preschool

As most of you know we had a decision to make about whether to put the triplets in preschool or not. Due to how early they were born, they have been a part of the early intervention state program here and when we were in Arizona. When they turn three they no longer qualify so we had them evaluated by the public school system to see if they qualified for pre school so they could continue working on a few of their delays. Last week we found out that although the kids have some weaknesses, they also have many strengths. Overall they do not qualify for service or preschool. Their speech is actually caught up to their actual age which is amazing considering they were only saying 1-2 word phrases in the Spring. They know all their colors, shapes, 10 numbers and most letters of the alphabet. I thought I would be disappointed if they didn't qualify because I really wanted them to get that interaction and extra help. But I wasn't disappointed. I felt extremely proud of them and so lucky that despite being born at 29 weeks and all the surgeries and hospital scares, they are doing so well. I actually feel overcome with emotion when I think about how far they have come. We toured another preschool which I really loved the teacher but in the end, have decided to keep them home, at least until cold/flu season is over and maybe longer. I feel very at peace with this choice and am honestly so exhausted of every aspect of their behavioral and physical development being evaluated and picked apart. Since they were born (and for their own good) they have been consistently evaluated and tested and seemed to be graded by Developmental Pediatricians, Developmental Specialists, Speech Therapists, and Educators and they are not even in school yet. I have spent many nights worrying about if they are behind, if they will catch up to their actual age, when they will start doing some of the things other kids their age are doing or what the results of the next evaluation will be. Now that so many have unanimously decided how well they are doing and that they don't qualify, I think they deserve a break, and a chance to just be a silly toddler and play without so many eyes on them. And in all honestly I need the break from that too. Soon they will be in school, taking tests and doing homework. The teachers and other school staff I'm sure will have an opinion on how well they are, or are not doing, but right now I think the only people that should be doing that is Tommy and I, for once, and for just for awhile. Thanks to everyone for their feedback on preschool. Although it was a tough decision, it was one that in the end I came to on my own and it feels right in my heart.  I am going to enroll them in a tumbling class which will be fun for them and help with gross motor skills. Otherwise I am happy to say, they are stuck with me, and that our little preemies are very bright and strong individuals who continue to beat the odds and overcome their challenges on their own timeline, not mine or anyone else's.

Last week we found out from the public school system that although the kids have some weaknesses, theyLast week we found out from the public school system that although the kids have some weaknesses, they also have many strengths. Overall they do not qualify for service or preschool. Their speech is actually caught to their age 33-35 months. They know all their colors, shapes, 10 numbers and most letters. I thought I would be disappointed because I really wanted them to get that interaction and extra help. But I wasn't disappointed. I felt extremely proud of them and so lucky that despite being born at 29 weeks and all the surgeries and hospital scares, they are doing so well. We toured another preschool which I really loved the teacher but have decided to keep them home, at least until cold/flu season is over. I feel very at peace with this choice and am honestly so tired of every aspect of their behavioral and physical development being evaluated and picked apart thanks to everyone for their feedback. I think I am going to enroll them in a tumbling class which will be fun for them and help with gross motor skills. Otherwise they are stuck with me

True Stories of Terrible Twos with Triplets

I wrote this August 13, 2014 and never posted:

Since my kids have turned two I hardly have time to write anymore. I had much more time when they were infants, hanging out in the bouncers and rolling around the play mats. Now, if I leave the room for a second even to go pee, it is the end of the world. If I try to make dinner..forget it, they will pee on the floor, climb the walls, and do everything they possibly can to get my attention in a negative way. You would think they would want to eat but they are not old enough to understand there is a process involved. They want my undivided attention EVERY moment they are awake and they don't want to sleep.

One of my biggest challenges as a mom of triplets is that I am so used to doing everything for them, feeding, dressing, lifting, walking, everything! I do this because if I let them try to do all this themselves every time we left the house or ate a meal, we would literally never leave the house or the table. They are slow as molasses, Getting them up and down the stairs is like herding cattle. Not to compare my beautiful miracles to cows but lets face it, they are two, there are three of them and their listening skills are not great. Because of this they are somewhat delayed in the self help category. They should be doing more themselves at this age (34 months) than they are. So, now we have to practice getting dressed during playtime, and we have to allow extra time before every outing so they can practice going up and down the stairs and putting their shoes on, etc. Once they can do more things for them selves, that will be one thing that will make my life much easier.

Another huge challenge is getting them to understand why its important to not run in the street and that they should stay close to mom. I have almost lost my son THREE times at play dates and events due to how chaotic it is when you have three toddlers running around amidst many other kids and people. I do need eyes in the back of my head and another set of arms would be helpful too.

Lastly, the constant whining and crying every time they want something or are fighting over something with their siblings is a little, well, its annoying. They know how to talk but they choose to scream a high pitched scream to get every ones attention all throughout the day. Oye. With one toddler, you may only experience this periodically or on play dates. The whining and screaming is constant which is why I prefer to get them out of the house if possible but then I risk losing my son, so you pick your battles I guess?

I could go on and on about why my husband and I have decided that having two year old triplets is WAY harder than when they were infants. Yes, we got less sleep, but honesty the sleep is still not great. It takes hours to get them to bed and then they still wake up  in the middle of the night and need us and are up with the sun. But I still LOVE my children and I LOVE watching them learn and my life would be empty and hollow without all this believe it or not. I do have to be realistic though and the reality is that it is very very hard being a mom and very very hard being a mom of triplets at this age. Below I compiled a list of funny stories and scary moments from their twos. I hear three is even tougher but I will survive! All too soon they will be grown, and I will wish for these days back. At least I can laugh about it.

Where is Mickey Story #1  - In an effort to make friends in a new city, I finally got the courage up to join another mom at the mall play area. The kids were running around, climbing the different plastic animals and I was carefully chatting with my new friend. Of course in a split second, Mickey is no where to be seen. My heart dropped, I panicked, I thought how will I tell Tommy I lost our son? Luckily we found him. Then he began running out of the play area and into the department store again and again as a game now. It was fun for him to have me chase after him, so one time I didn't, thinking he would stop and come back. But he didn't come back. My heart dropped again. I ran deep into the department store and found him in the juniors section dancing to the music.

Trying to Make Dinner #1 - I was trying to make dinner and I could hear the kids running around screaming behind me. I was making a new recipe and trying to focus on the measurements when I suddenly realized Georgia was standing there saying "sissy, bubba" and the other two were NOT THERE. I left the stove top on and ran to the front door which I realized they had opened. I slammed the door shut behind me so Georgia wouldn't get out. I ran into the street of the neighborhood and couldn't see them. I looked right and left again and there they were running up the street in their pull ups with some nice lady who had stopped her car to help them when she noticed them running alone. I thanked her profusely and went with my escapees to the front door to realize it had locked behind be. The front door had always been locked but it didn't latch closed which is how they got out so when I slammed it behind me in a panic I locked us out and Georgia inside with the stove on, and I had no phone. Luckily a neighbor saw me at my front door holding two half naked toddlers in my hands and let me borrow her phone. Just then Tommy drove in the driveway. Saved again. Barely.

Trying to Make Dinner  #2- As soon as I got up to make dinner the kids started with their mischief. It wasn't until I heard mickey slip and fall that I realized they were doing something they were not supposed to. I found one of my daughters in the bathroom with the faucet on, water covering the floor which Mickey had slipped and hit his head. Sigh. So much for trying to make dinner. Now I am cleaning the bathroom and cuddling my son.

The Fireplace - Making dinner became such a challenge. I couldn't always wait for my husband to come home and someone suggested giving them all play bowls and spoons and tell them they are helping mommy with dinner, so that's what I did and it worked! I didn't hear a peep and I made dinner in record time. Yes!!!.....NO! Later that night I went to turn the gas fireplace on. A couple minutes later I noticed a funny smell and smoke pouring out the fireplace. They had thrown all their plastic food in the fireplace. The smoke alarms were going off.. It was chaos. Luckily my husband was able to get the fire out by pouring water in it. But now the fireplace in broken. Sigh.

Where is Mickey Story #2 - It is 4th of July and we are all at the event in Charlottesville for fireworks and fun! We set up all our chairs and blankets in a great spot to see what should be some awesome firecrackers. The kids got their face painted and were happily sucking on lollipops. It was a great night so far. We were hanging out at the chairs and my husband left to get us a snack and some water. I was watching the girls when I looked up and Mickey was gone! There were thousands of people here. All I saw was a sea of red, white and blue!  I could see an older man watch me as I panicked searching for my son. He could have gotten up to help me but that is besides the point. I ran up and down the hill looking for Mickey and when I didn't see him I texted my husband to come back right away, that I couldn't find him. Just as I did, I saw Mickey in the parking lot jumping over something  in the road innocently not even realizing how far he had gone. Scariest moment ever! I thought we would never find him in all those people. Just then my husband got back and we decided to go without food and water for the rest of the night.

Where is Mickey Story #3 - I was on a first time play date with some moms in the area we live in. I was doing as I always do and counting periodically...1...2...3, to make sure I knew they were all accounted for. They were. I began telling one of my new friends the story about Mickey at the mall and when I looked back maybe 15 seconds later, he was gone...again. All the moms were scouring the park and playground calling for Mickey. Once again my heart was racing, he could be anywhere in this neighborhood. Then someone spotted him across the street in someones front yard, exploring. Did I mention he had crossed a very busy neighborhood street to get there? How will I ever keep him contained?

I probably have so many more stories I could share and if I had kept up with this blog it would be easier, I could tell you about potty training triplets and all the poop and pee I have cleaned up in the last 6 months and how they yell "yayyyyy" and start clapping in public restrooms when they go. I could tell about all the hilarious dance parties we have every day, about how they put each other to bed at night and say to every single older man with gray hair "hi grandpa". I could tell you about the long nights when Georgia wakes up crying and then wakes up Jo Jo and then Mickey and how we pretty much don't sleep after that. I could tell you about all the hugs and kisses  I get every day and the new words they say every day. They know all their colors and shapes, can count to ten and even know most of the letters.

This month they will be three. The terrible twos will be over and they weren't so terrible. Some days were....challenging and some moments my sanity hanged in the balance but then they look at me, say "mommy, hug?" and raise their arms up to the sky and I remember why I wanted to be a mom and wonder how I was possibly blessed with the three greatest kids in the world!

ALS Ice Bucket Challenge 2014

I wrote this entry awhile ago, August 13 2014 during the middle of the ALS Ice Bucket Challenge and never finished or posted:


I started this blog to be about my kids and our unique journey together, but I also wanted it to be something they can look back on and remember when they are older, or something I leave for them to hopefully learn from. So, I pause from writing about them periodically, to writing about something else that is very personal to me, but also to so many others.

I cannot let the opportunity go by without writing about the recent ALS Ice Bucket Challenge. As almost everyone knows that is how my dad lost his life.  I have seen so many wonderful videos of people taking the ice bucket challenge, sports teams, actors, musicians, Jimmy Fallon, Martha Stewart, just to name a few. I was at the neighborhood pool today with my kids and the lifeguards were doing it. Its everywhere! Which is amazing because most people don't even know what it is. I think I have waited since November 2008 for ALS to get this kind of coverage and I am in awe. Every single person that has posted a video or made a donation, you are making a huge difference, something I've never seen before and I'm amazed and grateful to all of you, even the millions I have never met. Thank you. But with that comes a lot of cruel, disrespectful jokes which as I hard as I try to not take personally, it is personal to me. Because I miss my dad, because he never got to walk me down the aisle, because he never got to meet his grand kids, because I never got to say goodbye. But although I took the Ice Bucket Challenge in his memory, that is not the main reason why this challenge is so important and its not something you should joke about. ALS is no joke! It kills and it does not discriminate. Anyone can get it...even you or someone you love.

I admit when my dad told me and my sister he was sick, I had no idea what it was. I think I had heard of it before but all I kept thinking in the back of my head is OK well they can probably treat it right? WRONG! There is no treatment. No one knows for sure what causes it and there is no cure. The average life expectancy is 2-5 years, my dad was gone after 4 months.

As heart breaking as it is for me to admit... it is too late for my dad. The reason why its important to spread awareness for this disease and raise money is because there are so many people out there dying right now and their families are sitting there watching them, completely and utterly helpless. These people might give anything to say "I love you" to their husband or wife but their voice muscles don't work anymore so they can't. They would love to give their son or daughter a hug but there arm muscles have deteriorated to the point they cant even pick up a fork to eat on their own. They may have once danced across the stage, or hit a home run out of the ball park, or ran marathons, but not anymore. They are fighting to breath because their respiratory muscles are slowly deteriorating as well. Their bodies are literally withering away while their mind stays perfectly in tact so they are aware of every single thing that is happening to them, much like being trapped inside your own body.

I'm not trying to be negative here, but everyone needs to understand that this is a very serious disease that is not as well known as some of the others and deserves some attention too. The people that are dying from this disease or have not been diagnosed (yet) deserve a chance. A chance my dad didn't have and right now no one else does either. So it may seem like some silly social media fad and a "waste of water" but its not, its peoples lives, so stop making jokes and start giving others hope. Sometimes hope is all that they left when they are told they have ALS.

I want to thank everyone that accepted the challenge from me or donated money and for everyone that followed after them as well. Some of you have been supporting me and this cause since my dad died over 5 years ago and I just want to say that means the world to me.

Since the challenge began the ALS association has raised over $114 million dollars, and has had 2.5 million first time donors, numbers they have never even come close to. I have to say my hope is still alive for a cure and who knows... because of this challenge maybe I will even be around to see that day happen.