In Memory of Erin Golding

So many thoughts traveling through my brain today. I am deviating from my timeline on this blog to write about something or I should say someone very important. I still have blogs I need to write to catch up to present day but as usual, falling behind, so kids...bare with me if the dates are confusing when you are reading this later. Today is Easter Sunday 2015. I should be celebrating. Celebrating Jesus and what he sacrificed for us. But I am not. I am mourning the death of someone who had so much life left to live. Erin was our nanny after the babies came home from the hospital. In fact, I am sure I have wrote about her before. She was always calling in sick which in turn meant I had to. Only later to find out she was very sick with bone cancer. That was 3 years ago in 2012. Last night she left this world. I am trying to wrap my head around why someone so young would have to go. I know that people, kids much younger die and it's never fair and it's always awful, every life lost before their time is crushing. There have been two times before this where I was reminded just how fragile life can be. The first was when I lost my dad before he could walk me down the aisle or meet my children. The second was when we were told 2 days after the babies were born that Jolynne needed surgery or she would die and there was a 50% chance she wouldn't survive the surgery. I watched my babies fight to live their first three months. They overcame and survived despite being born at 29 weeks but not without leaving me a little (or a lot) shook up.

 Today I am so sad, not for the loss I feel in my life, because admittedly Erin and I were not that close, but because I cared about her. I entrusted my babies lives with her in their most crucial time at home. Mickey was still having breathing and swallowing issues, Jolynne's tummy was still not 100% and we left them in her care every day as we went to work, and she kept our children safe, and she CARED for them. Today I am feeling sad that she never got the chance to have children of her own, or fall in love and get married or even decide with certainty what she wanted to do. I am feeling even more sad that because she was old enough to understand what was happening to her, she was probably well aware of all the things she wanted to do that she probably wouldn't be able to. There is a lot about Erin I don't know but what I do know is that she cared deeply for others. Different care givers over the years have felt a connection with one of the three triplets. At daycare, one of the teachers was in love with Georgia, in the hospital there was a nurse that adored Mickey. Erin instantly felt a connection to Jolynne. She commented soon after she started that she had a scar on her stomach just like Jo Jo's. Over the last couple years, she is quick to like or comment on a picture of Jolynne. It is nothing against the other too or that she cared for them less, it was simply an understanding of some things Jolynne had to go through in her early days, some similar experiences to her own I suppose. A new friend at church today asked me if I had any pictures of Erin with the kids and so I came home searching for at least one. There had to be one. She was with them every day, all day long but regretfully she was always the one taking the pictures. Erin sent me this picture a month ago of Jolynne and said "looking through old pics on my phone and saw this precious baby".

I am sad thinking about the cancer she had and that she spent the last couple years fighting for her life in her mid twenties while so many others were taking theirs for granted. I think about all the things I have got to do and the struggles I think I have when in fact they are nothing compared to what she had to struggle with. I am sad when I think about the fact that she had cancer but she died from the thing that was supposed to save her from it (chemotherapy), and the toll it took on her body. I think about all the recent conversations her and I have had about essentials oils and her strong interest in them. She said she hated pills, she hated that every time she left the hospital she felt weaker than when she went in and I wonder if she could have afforded the oils if they would have made a difference.

In the end I don't think its fair that Erin had to die at age 27. Today while we are singing in church and hunting Easter eggs with our children and enjoying meals with our loved ones, her parents are saying goodbye to their little girl, and her sister is saying goodbye to her best friend.

I know that Erin is in a better place and I should be clear there is a lot I do not know about her struggle or her last days and quite frankly its none of my business. But I want my kids to know someday that at this point they have had two nannies that loved them and took precious care of them. One of them was Erin Golding, and she would have been in their lives longer if she could have. I want them to know who she was and how precious life is. I want them to care for other people the way she cared for them. Rest in Peace Erin. We are grateful to have had you in our lives for a short time and blessed to have known you.

Georgia and Mommy go to Florida

It was Georgia's turn for some one on one time with mommy. It's the middle of December, Christmas is right around the corner, and the weather is pretty chilly. Why not go see my best friend, Christina, and meet my God daughter Kennedi. Christina and her family came to see us after we first moved to Virginia in May which meant a lot to me. At the time I was feeling so homesick and still hadn't made friends here. It was during that trip she asked me to be Kennedi's godmother and I was and still am so honored. I was so bummed I could not be at the baby shower. The move into our new house completely wiped us out, and was much more money than we anticipated. Luckily, Tommy had a couple tickets on Southwest so that I could go see Christina and bring Georgia with me.

Georgia was definitely not as easy to travel with as Mickey. She didn't want to keep her seat belt on. She kept saying she had to go to the bathroom on the plane, and then we would get there and she said she didn't have to go. She was fussy, she didn't want to sit down. It was tough to keep her happy. The flights were pretty bumpy too so it was just not an ideal time for her to act like this but we survived. We got to Orlando just in time for dinner and all went for Pizza at this local place near where Christina lives. It was really good....Georgia especially was stuffing her face with two slices at once. That girl loves pizza!!! We got to their house after dinner and Christina surprised us with presents. One for Georgia and I got a beautiful framed picture of Kennedi that is now hanging in our guest room. I loved it! After the kids went to bed Christina and I stayed up for hours drinking wine and talking just like old times. I so wish we lived closer and could have nights like that more often, but I cherish them every time we do. I noticed in Christina's guest room she had hung up a couple poems I had written. That was so special to me and reminded me that I need to write more...something that is becoming increasing difficult as the kids get older.

 

The next day we had lots of fun planned for the girls. Todd was having a daddy/daughter day with Kennedi so that we could take Sophia and Georgia for a girls day out! Our first stop was a little day spa for girls. Sophia and Georgia got manicures and they got their hair done to look like princesses. Georgia could not decide between orange and pink since those are both her favorite colors so her nails were both colors. Then she had her hair twisted up in the back with glitter and some light eye shadow and lip gloss. Sophia and Georgia were so excited and all smiles. They had their little princess dresses on and they were cute as can be. It was such a cool moment to see them all dolled up together.

After that we headed to Tommy Bahama where Todd is the Executive Chef and had a yummy lunch, as always, then we were off to the Gaylord Palms, ICE event. There were ice slides and a show you walked through with tons of ice sculptures all with the Nutcracker theme. The only problem was it was so busy, so there were a lot of lines to wait in, which normally would have been ok but Georgia was being so impatient. I think it was a combination of not taking a long enough nap and that she was constipated. Again, she kept saying she had to potty but wouldn't go when we got there and she was very fussy. I felt like I was really struggling to keep her happy at this point which made me sad because I wanted her to have a good time and enjoy the time we were spending with our friends. The ice sculptures were beautiful. Its amazing how talented those people are. Afterwards, we went to the gift shop and got some yummy treats for the kids before heading to the slides. This was our favorite part. We got a double enter tube and Georgia and I went down the slide together. I got Georgia on video saying "AGAIN?" after we got to the bottom. You can see it yourself at the end of this blog entry. We got to slide down twice but I think Georgia could have done that all day. She got pretty upset again when it was over.

 

When we got back to Christina's, Georgia was not herself. I could tell something was wrong. She was having a lot of pee pee accidents which was not like her. She wouldn't tell me when she had to go potty and she was crying a lot. I decided to give her a warm bath a little later and realized she was in fact constipated. She really needed to go but it hurt so bad. Poor girl. I hated seeing her so upset and feeling so helpless. She finally got it all out though and was much better after that. If you are reading this later in life Georgia dear....sorry, not trying to embarrass you sweetheart. We've all had moments like this at some point or another.

On Sunday, it was time for Christina and I to have some mommy time, so we went to get pedicures and had a nice lunch sitting outside. I was going to soak up as much of the sun as I could. We thought about taking the girls somewhere later but decided against it. I think everyone was tired from Saturday. It was nice just hanging out at the house and watching the kids play and spending time with Kennedi too. Of course, Georgia loved Kennedi. She loves her so much she came home and finally gave her baby doll a name....Kennedi!

 

I was so sad to leave the next day, but ready to get Georgia back in a routine and get her potty situation back under control....which it is now. For some reason I notice any time the routine is thrown off, she starts to have accidents. It's happened a few times since we've been back. Even though she wasn't feeling 100%, Georgia had a great time. She still talks about the trip months later and about her friends Sophia and Kennedi. We cant wait to see them again soon! Hopefully in October when the whole family can be there! I know we are still not living in the same state but at least we are on the same side of the country which should make it easier to see each other. I am so grateful for all the new friendships I am making in Virginia but there a few people who nobody will ever compare to. I miss my best friend and love her more infinity x infinity!

 

 

Here is the video of Georgia and I going down the ice slide. It was much like our whole trip - It was fun, it went by too fast and then it was over.......until next time.

 

 

 

My Miracles Turn Three

Well, another year has gone by in a flash. Something I learned since becoming a mother is that the days are long and the years are short. Its so true. Since becoming a stay at home mom I realize this even more. This last year for the babies (toddlers) has been a year of growth. I see these tiny people standing in front of me, telling me what they want and asking me questions and yes, testing me. My babies are growing up. And although they have always had minds of their own, now they are learning to speak them. When they turned two they were still significantly behind in their speech saying one, maybe two words. At two and half, there was not much improvement. Then it happened over night one day in June, they just started speaking in sentences. One day is was three words, then four then I lost count. Now they have caught up to other kids their age. They have been dismissed from the Early Intervention program, something they have been in since they were born. They still have a weakness or two but don't we all? No more significant developmental delays at this time. They are now potty trained (for the most part). Still sleeping in pull ups but that's ok. Georgia goes back and forth with the potty training sometimes, we have to re train her if she gets out of her normal routine but is back on track within a couple days. And they have grown physically! They are still a little on the short side but not to where there is a concern like last year. They are growing consistently every 6 months to a year at the rate they should be. My little preemies are little kids. Lately they love to fight with each other. I think its a battle to see who is in charge. But they also have the sweetest moments. For example Tommy went into the girls room this morning and found both of them laying on the floor together with their pillows right next to each other. They walk around the house, singing and dancing and doing ring around the rosy and without me. Although sometimes they ask me to join in. They chase each other and are so good at pretend. The girls really love their baby dolls and putting them to sleep and feeding them and changing their clothes or pushing them around in their strollers. Mickey doesn't seem to actually like to play with toys, he likes to slam them into the ground or throw them or knock them over, or throw them down the stairs. And where the girls used to tackle and gang up on him now it is the other way around. He can be very rough with them and loves to jump on top of them and wrestle. At the beginning of Spring, these guys could barely climb up onto the play sets at the park and they needed help down the slide. Now they are like little  monkeys climbing up the slides and going down the big ones. I have a had a few heart attacks because they will just go for it and they are quick, but luckily so far, no major injuries. I just have to have eyes on the back and the sides of my head.

So suddenly at age 3, I see the biggest difference in them. They are not babies. They are little kids. For their birthday we had an impromptu birthday party which originally we were not going to do but decided last minute to have a few friends over. The kids really got into it. My friend Amy made them each their own cake and we sang to each of them individually. To see the looks on their faces brought tears to my eyes. For the first time in their life, they understood, it was their moment and they blew out the candles. The next day Tommy and I drove up to DC to see Disney on Ice Presents Frozen. It was a lot of sitting between the car ride and the show but they loved seeing all their favorite characters and hearing their favorite songs. We made it back home in time for a little more cake before the day was over. It was tough being away from our family and friends back in Arizona and Colorado, it was weird but I am guessing that will be the norm on their birthday from now on. We are grateful for things like Facetime, Skype and for the new friends we have made here in Virginia.

Below is a update on each of my miracles.

Georgia Dawn

Weight; 38lbs (94th percentile)

Height: 36 inches (24th percentile)

Favorite Color: Orange

Favorite Character: Sophia the First and Elsa

Favorite place to go: Dinner

Georgia is still the bossy one and likes telling people what to do. Most of her sentences start with "I want...." or "You are going to...." or "I am going to..." and "Lets Go!". She loves to eat and snuggle with mommy. She can be very impatient but she is still my Peaches. She likes to pretend she is a princess and to play dress up. She loves her tumbling class and follows instructions in there very well. She will smile from ear to ear running around, jumping and balancing on the beams. 

Jolynne Marie

Weight: 34lbs (79th Percentile)

Height: 35.6 inches (16th Percentile)

Favorite Color: Purple

Favorite Character: Anna and Elsa

Favorite Place to Go: Anywhere with Daddy

Jo Jo is the easiest to please right now. Mostly because she can entertain herself for long periods of time. Actually I think she prefers to play alone sometimes. Most of her sentences start with "Mommy look at Georgia...." and she is very quick to correct me if I say "Hi baby" She responds "No, I'm Jo Jo" (insert sad face here). She is daddy's girl! She can be a somewhat picky eater and is a very slow eater. Sometimes she is a little fearful to trying new things but we are helping her with that. She is still tough though so don't get in her way. She is very smart and good at organizing things according to color.

Mickey Aaron

Weight: 33.5lbs (68th percentile)

Height: 36.75lbs (30th percentile)

Favorite Color: Blue

Favorite Character: The Snow Monster

Favorite Place to Go: The Park

Some might think Mickey is all boy! He wants to be free to run and throw things and tackle his sisters. He wants to explore everything outside. But if you watch closely you will see him comforting a baby doll every once in awhile or trying to wear his sisters dress up clothes. His sentences usually start with "Where's your car"? He is obsessed with knowing where everyones car is even when he knows where it is. He also likes to say "I'm funny" and starts to crack up, laughing at himself. It reminds me of his Papa (my dad). He loves to see his friends and continues to be a ladies man. He loves giving hugs. At tumbling, he has no troubles keeping up with the older kids. He can run, jump, climb just like the rest of them. He also loves to count!

I guess I should add that Mickey is a big fan of Jo Jo. He likes to follow her around. They are pretty close pals. Georgia marches to the beat of her own drum, but seems to make friends pretty easily when we have play dates. Its definitely been a year of ups and downs from a parenting standpoint. I'm learning every day and they are teaching me sometimes instead of the other way around. Funny how that works. But they continue to amaze. To think they were 2 pounds and fighting to survive 3 years ago, you would never know. We continue to count or blessings and are so thankful for their health. These three little people are the greatest gift and like I've said before...the rest is just extra. They have a had a great year and I can't wait to continue to watch them thrive and grow! 

All photos by Limefish Studio

Weekend Family Getaway to Virginia Beach

Its been such a busy year with so many changes and a lot of unplanned expenses that came with the move. We couldn't afford to do a big family vacation or go back to Arizona. It was just too expensive. But hey, it's September, summer is almost over and the chance to be outside in Virginia is going to end soon. The beach is only a couple hours away and it may not be Cancun but its the ocean. I'll take it. Especially some much needed time for all of us to be together.

Virginia Beach (the city area) is not that great. Pretty old and run down in my opinion. But we found a nice, new hotel right on the beach with a gorgeous view of the water. We brought three toddler cots that we got from Walmart and they were perfect size since now the triplets are too big for cribs and pack and plays but not big enough for regular beds where they can fall off.

 

The first thing we did was grab some lunch on the beach. Yum fish tacos!!!

We tried to get the kids to take a nap but that wasn't happening. We changed into our swim suits and headed to the beach. The water was pretty rough and the waves were pretty strong compared to what we were used to at the lake. Mickey wanted to jump right in like usual but he would have been carried away for sure, so Tommy stayed close to him and I sat with the girls by the shore where they played with the sand and buckets. They had no interest in the water. Eventually it got tough trying to keep them in one spot so we opted to move to the pool which was a nice indoor and outdoor pool.

 

We ended the day with a delicious dinner at a local seafood restaurant that supposedly is the founder of the soda drink "Orange Crush". The kids were not on their best behavior and kept having to go potty the whole time. Despite how cute they are in the pictures, it was probably the most challenging they have been in public at a restaurant but at least the food was good.

It was so nice the next morning to wake up and drink my coffee while watching the sunrise over the water! And we even saw dolphins right off our balcony. We took the kids to the Aquarium that morning. We thought they would love seeing all the fish...Nemo is one of their favorite movies, but we were so wrong. They were scared of everything. They wouldn't get near any of the tanks, they cried almost the whole way through. So...maybe next time?


After that we took them on a pirate ship boat tour and I made the mistake of telling them they could have ice cream. Another not so brilliant moment because I got push pops and they just melted everywhere, all over their clothes, all over the ship, and all over their faces. They were also a little young for some of the games the other kids were playing but they still liked to be out on the water and hanging out with pirates. Argh! We got off the ship just in time to miss the big storm that was headed right for us. It rained the rest of day so Tommy and I hung out in the hotel room while they napped and we just grabbed some lunch from the bar. Since going back to the beach or the pool was out the question, we decided to go to this old arcade and played some games. I felt like I was back in the 80's or the movie Tron. They had some really cool old games and Pink Floyd was playing on the juke box. I probably would have loved that place in high school. Tommy and I won them some tickets and prizes before we headed to another good dinner.

 

The next day we all took in one last look of the ocean before heading back towards home. It was such a short trip, but very worth it. Hopefully next year we can travel a little further for our vacation and the kids will be better behaved, but the most important thing is that they had fun and they got to try new things. Seeing them happy and being together as a family is all I need. I am looking forward to the next family adventure!